Hungry

I was on the ice the other day, and one of my fellow coaches tells me that he is hungry.  This was past lunchtime.  It was Saturday, when we have back to back to back to back sessions, and the coaches can be there from early morning to late afternoon.  I told him that I usually bring protein bars, but I didn't have them that day.

I didn't make it there for the earlier sessions.  I've been enjoying the well deserved breaks in the summer mornings, so I was home and actually got a chance to properly eat.  So I didn't need to bring protein bars or snacks.  But I usually would stock up on them.  They are very helpful to have when you would spend whole days and nights at the rink without getting a chance to eat.

I started bringing protein bars when I worked in I.T. many years ago.  There would be some nights when I would find myself stuck in a server room for hours troubleshooting and fixing problems.  I could end up there from the start of day to past midnight, and one time I was there after daybreak.  Sometimes the client would be kind enough to order pizza or something, but otherwise we would basically starve.  So I learned to prepare and bring those protein bars.

I think some people are able to forget their hunger under pressure and not think about food.  My colleagues may have been like that.  But I'm quite the opposite.  I think about lunch time and dinner time.  And the more aware I become about missing a meal, the hungrier I feel.  And I get lightheaded and dizzy and I start getting headaches.  Having a little bit of sustenance gives me relief, and I am able to continue working again.  Or skating or coaching or driving or just functioning in general.

So sometimes, decided what to eat with other people makes me irritable.   Because it makes me think about where to go, how to get there, and more importantly, how long it would take before we can actually eat.  And all that awareness and calculation makes me even hungrier.  When people are discussing the options, I can feel my stomach grumble and my head begins spinning.  It is especially annoying when I am the one who has to drive to get there.  

I feel like it is mostly in my head, but it does affect me physically.  I can definitely go a long time without eating, but that's if I don't think about it.  But I do think too much.  And I worry too much.  But actually sometimes when I actually don't think about it and it catches up to me, I find myself actually having actual headaches, and those are the ones that don't go away easily.  Taking aspirin usually helps, but it takes a while until I feel better.  So I guess, I would rather worry too much and generate the headaches instead of getting actual migraines without being able to control it.  

But anyways, yeah, I don't like being hungry.